I decided I love my life. God never abandoned me. It was my heart and my mind that makes up anxiety and depression. I’m free. Free to do whatever I choose to do and succeed in it.
Just this Monday, when my partner was off to work at night, my depression came in and I panicked. I called my mom but she was busy. I was heart broken. I don’t know who else to call or to talk to because nobody was there. I wept and I remembered God and called out to Him. I prayed and told Him I feel alone and empty. I poured my heart out. Told Him what was wrong and then after that I felt fine and happy. I realized I just have to remember Him and tell him what’s wrong and I will feel ok. I realized I’m self-sufficient with God on my side. I don’t need anyone. But regardless, I love my family and my partner whether they’re present or not. I just need my God. And He is always present. Always there. I feel Him. I read books about Him and I know He delights in me seeking His presence.
I never posted in Facebook what was wrong in me. I am ashamed. Depression is as hard as it is. But I just want to face it with God all along. I am happy and contented with God on my side. I never want to forget Him. He is my light and my compass. And He knows I love Him because I seek Him. Maybe sometimes I forget. But I always go back and cry for Him for help. And He never abandoned me. Just remember Him and He will be there. I’m just a prayer away.
The Whisper 